Sunday, July 10, 2011

What To Say to a Depressed Dog.

(from the May 2011 Atlantic Magazine; 'What's your Problem?' column, by Jeffrey Goldberg.)

I recently had my dog neutered, and I swear he's mad at me. Before the neutering, he was the friendliest dog in the world. Now he keeps his distance and gives me, if I'm not mistaken, disapproving looks. How do I mitigate his anger?
B.C, Toronto, Canada

Dear B.C.,
You should explain to him, in a firm but empathetic tone, that his castration will reduce occurrences of undesirable sexually dimorphic behavior and testosterone-induced inflammation of the prostate, and will contribute other ancillary health benefits. Tell him you are confident that he will, in time, come to accept and even appreciate his new anatomy. Make it clear that he is not alone, and that he should continue to be honest and direct with you about his emotions. and if all this fails, remind him that he's a fucking dog.

1 comment:

  1. Yeah, he'll get over it, just like that tom cat I had fixed.


Go ahead, you can do it! Just whistle if you want me. You know how to whistle, don't you? You just put your lips together and BLOW....

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