Thursday, August 5, 2010

Comment Moderation

I've been debating writing about this and decided what the heck..it's my blog and, well, I'll write whatever I feel I should, so here goes..

I have been moderating comments left here for several months now. I hate having to do this. I began this blog because I love to write. I wanted to write stuff that left folks smiling, or at least feeling a tad better than they did prior to stopping by.

Things in my personal life occurred that caused my decision to begin to moderate comments. We all have a personal life above and beyond our blogs, above and beyond the (mostly) wonderful world of the web in general. So my comment moderation here began as a way to keep control of what people in my personal life might choose to do.

However, and without going into any deeper explanation of that, a different problem surfaced; an individual I do not know other than for this blog, began to leave what I deem as extremely inappropriate comments. I've debated as to how much to say, and decided to clean up the language and explain.

One comment had to do with my sex life and, to put it as delicately as I can and still relate the contents of the post, what I would need to wipe off my face after having sex. This has no place on my blog. It was put in the crassest of terminology and I made the decision to delete the comment before it even made its way here.

Another comment from this same person had to do with my religious beliefs and (again) was a sexual comment pertaining to the quality of Christ's sex life.

I think you get my drift.

Make no mistake; I HATE moderating comments. I am one of THOSE people, a (gasp!) liberal. I live in the deep South. Politically I am a little blue dot in a big red world. I voted for Obama. I was threatened and insulted during the last Presidential election and learned to keep my political views to myself just to avoid being harassed.

My point is, with these liberal views of mine, I do not believe in censoring anybody except in the most necessary of circumstances. I believe with all of my heart that folks have the right to not only believe what they choose to believe but also that they have the right to voice their opinion without fear of any sort of hostile verbal retaliation. However, I expect the same treatment back.

A person who visits my blog fairly regularly has taken offense that I denied his posts ..the ones I told you about above.. and, hurling some insults my way, told me he was sick and tired of my comment moderation and my only posting what I approve (hey, this is MY blog!) and would not be back.

That's fine. I really don't care. It's his choice. But what I do care about is that belief of mine that people have the right to express themselves. I take that very seriously. And yet I believe it is my duty to not allow offensive, inappropriate comments on my blog. Express your opinions in a respectful manner, that's all I ask.

Was I wrong to deny posting of, for example, the two comments I told you about a bit earlier? I don't think so.

I want to know how y'all feel about comment moderation.

10 comments:

  1. To me, when I leave a comment on someones blog, it doesn't bother me if they have the moderation on or not.
    However, I don't think that I've ever left any comments that couldn't be posted. I'd feel terrible if I said something that offended another person.
    Personally, I had to get rid of the anonymous comment ability. Someone that said they "knew me" and "used to be my friend", started leaving terrible comments. I think that if you don't have the guts to get yourself a profile and then say those same things to me, you lose your right to comment on my blog.
    Blah! Sometimes I wonder if Blogging is even worth it. Most people are wonderful but it only takes one mean one to ruin it.

    Bottom line. It's your blog. Do whatever you wish. :)

    ((Hugs))
    Laura

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  2. Laura, blogging has added so much to my life, most significantly, the wonderful friends I have met..including yourself.

    The thing is, my kids wander in here from time to time and do not need to be exposed to that crap through, of all things, their mother's blog!

    I so appreciate your commenting on this. ((Hugs)) back to you!

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  3. I consider you a wonderful friend as well! :)

    I'm the same. My kids sometimes read my blogs and it really upsets them if someone has been unkind to me. I wouldn't be able to have anything questionable in the comment section either.

    My husband and kids don't care if there is some harmless flirting going on but cruel or rude remarks are something different. It's upsetting to everyone.

    I enjoy blogging too. However, sometimes things do upset me. It's a love/hate thing with me.

    ((Hugs))
    Laura

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  4. You know my friend.. I think its a great thing to have when you have a person trying to ruin it for everyone else. I understand about the kids even the grown up kids.. They dont need to see someone beliddling there mother like that.. I enjoy reading here and being your friend so if you need to put up the moderation go YOU. YOU GO GIRL..

    some people just want it all about them and dont care what it takes to hurt someone else.. So hugs and hope this thing blows over with whom ever was in your way.

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  5. Thanks tweetey. maybe someday soon I can take it down and be 'normal' again!

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  6. First, i am so sorry you had to have any stress associated with your fun of blogging, how rotten of that person to be a downer and negative on such a fun activity.

    You aren't wrong to feel this way and moderate the comments. I get it.

    However...I'll share a little of my experience...

    I've had some disturbing posts at my blog over the last few years...very few and far between...but right awful. It was sexual...it was name-calling and abusive.

    You know what? I left it there...because i believe it allows people to see the true colours of the people involved. And...my other visitors responded...they took care of business ina clear-headed way and the comments stopped. I didn't have to moderate or delete or say anything.

    I haven't taken anything off my blog (except one thing...when a girlfriend wished me happy birthday...I took it off because I didn't want it public knowledge...I never gave my birthday at Constant Reader either...I was just paranoid about identity theft on the internet ya know?)


    Everything else full go. and I had one visitor who left such a vile post on my blog. It had been deleted at a book web board and so he went and put it at my blog. I just left it. His karma not mine.

    anyways....I don't mind f you moderate comments ...the only thing is though...is that it kind of messes with the natural flow of a blog by delaying responses. sometimes an exciting thing about a blog is if conversation can arise and flow...when moderating discussion usually hits a stand still.

    but its all good.

    I dare that jerk to post anything here in the future...because I will cut them a new one...and I can put anyones mind in a diaper ha ha ha...so I got your back if you should decide to not moderate their future immature comments here. Only someone with a very small penis and worse, a small mind would secually harass you on a fun blog like yours Beej.

    ...and by the way...its against the law to sexually harass someone...so you could allow their comments Beej and call the FBI. I called the RCMP and the FBI when I was being harassed online...boy does that ever work! The FBI WILL track down someone who is sexually harassing someones blog. I've seen it work.

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  7. p.s. my daughter reads my blog...and she was upset by the comments...but believe me...she was harder on that jerk than the FBI!!!! ha ha!

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  8. Aww Candy, I love you. You are one of my 'peeps.' And I do remember when you were being harrassed tho you never told me any details.

    I'll eventually take off oomment moderation. I dont like it at all, partially for the reason you cited.

    xxoxoxoxooxoxo

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  9. There are some people that just need to go about their way because the only reason they deem it necessary to be on the fringe of anyone's life is so that they may piss in their Cheerios. Karma, no karma, whatever, self respect deems that you don't allow others to do such a thing. I'm fine with your moderation- it exists because some people don't know the line, or believe that they're so awesome the line doesn't exist....they're really not.
    I read this blog because I enjoy it- I don't enjoy the Cheerio pissers and furthermore, good riddance to them.

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  10. Thanks Anon. I know you have taken issue with this poster before.

    I appreciate your support.

    And when I get home from the bookstore tonight, I plan on moving ahead with a new post and leaving this topic in the dust where it belongs. :)

    ReplyDelete

Go ahead, you can do it! Just whistle if you want me. You know how to whistle, don't you? You just put your lips together and BLOW....

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