Monday, October 26, 2009

An Open Letter to Dr. Paulk

October 26. 2009

Dear Dr. Paulk,

It's me, Beej. I have been your patient now for almost five years. You have treated my entire family for all this time and we have developed a certain affection for you. It has always been a pleasure to see you, whether it has been in your office or at the hospital during one of my son's not-too-rare misadventures where he has ended up either sick or hurt, or even at the little book store where I work. As I was telling my friends at my blog just today, you have a very wonderful bed side manner.

However, today during my appointment with you, you hurt my feelings! You know I work out lot and have spent many years taking very good care of myself. I am fit, I am healthy and I may be aging as you said, but I am still in the prime of my life! and if you read my chart this morning, I weigh seven lbs. LESS than I did last time I saw you!

So, why did you insult me, Dr. Paulk? why did I leave your presence feeling, well, aging, and out of shape and not living up to what you expected pf me? Why? I didn't deserve this, Dr. Paulk!

THEN! After you finished with me, you sent me to see Nurse Bruno who made me feel like I have huge ugly popping veins and then, when I accidentally poke my wrist with his needle, he says Ouch! Like I hurt him or something! I am not happy, Dr. Paulk.

After my ordeal, arm heavy with an extraordinarily large cotton ball taped to my inner elbow, screaming to all who see it (who could miss it!?) that I have a large protruding vein, I have to write a check to you for $169.75!

Dr. Paulk, in spite of this, I will stay with you. I realise this visit was an exception to the rule and you deserve another chance. But please, do not hurt my feelings again. I can't handle it from you, of all people.

Take care, Dr. Paulk. See you next year.



  1. Nurse Bruno?????

    Good grief....what is this??? One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest part II????

    Just the name Nurse Bruno is terrifying....;-)

  2. Hahahhaahha!1 I swear to God, if his name wasn't Bruno, it should have been!


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